Recomended Candle Lighting

Bar & Bat Mitzvah Candle Lighting

Recommendations for Candle Lighting


There are no rules to your candle lighting, it’s a chance to honor and recognize the people you care about and remember it’s one big photo op! You can do speeches or just simply call people up . You don’t have to do 13 candles! You can have 3, Past, Present & Future, or  1 candle and do a big blowout, “I love you all so much I need you all here to help me blow out my candles” . Remember each candle will be more or less 2 minutes long so 13 candles is 26 +/- minutes of sitting. Have fun with the speeches and if possible practice them a couple of times before the big day.

TIP – Print out the speeches/names and glue or tape them to 5 x 7 note cards. That looks a lot better then holding a full sheet of paper.

We recommend building the energy in the candle lighting. If there are any memory candles they should go first and we can play a song in the background as something is being said for the person(s) being remembered. Usually memory candles are quick so a song often is not played. The next candles would be for grand parents, then aunts and uncles, cousins, family friends, camp friends, school friends, siblings then parents.


This is not the end all be all, it would be great if there was a special song that just came to mind with every person we called up. Nobody is analyzing the words to the song as they are called up. Have fun with the music, pick things with a good beat or that will make your guests sway. Most important build the energy and keep a beat going so people in their seats are eager to come back to the dance floor. The songs are also filler as photos are being taken.

Sample Order

  1. Memory Candle
  2. Grand Parents
  3. Grand Parents
  4. Aunts & Uncles, Cousins
  5. Aunts & Uncles, Cousins
  6. Family Friends
  7. Family Friend
  8. Camp Friends / Hebrew School Friends
  9. All Friends
  10. Sibling
  11. Sibling
  12. Mom & Dad
  13. GOH

Memory Candle

“I Will Always Love You” – Whitney Houston
“Memories”- Elvis Presley
“Memory” Theme from Cats – Barbara Streisand
“One Sweet Day”- Mariah Carey
“Poppa, Can You Hear Me” – Barbra Streisand (from “Yentl)
“Somewhere Out There”- James Ingram
“Tears In Heaven”- Eric Clapton
“The Way We Were” – Barbra Streisand
“There You’ll Be” – Faith Hill
“This One’s For You” – Barry Manilow
“To Where You Are” – Josh Groban
“Unforgettable” – Natalie & Nat “King” Cole
“Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again” – Phantom of the Opera


“Anytime You Need A Friend” Mariah Carey
“Bad Boys” (whatcha gonna do) Inner Circle (Cops Theme)
“Bad Boys” Miami Sound Machine
“Be Our Guest”Beauty & The Beast Soundtrack
“Best Friend” Brandy
“Boom, Boom, Boom”  The Outhere Brothers
“Count on Me” Whitney Houston & CeCE Winans (Waiting to Exhale)
“Friend Like Me” from the movie Aladdin
“Friends”(You Gotta Have Friends) Bette Midler
“Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” Cyndi Lauper
“Girls” (that’s what I really want) Beastie Boys
“Heal The World” Michael Jackson
“Hello Mudda, Hello Fadda”  Comp Song
“I’ll Be There For You” Rembrants (Theme from Friends)
“I’ll Be There” Mariah Carey
“If I Ruled The World” NAS
“Kids In America” The Muffs
“Lean On Me”
“Lump” Presidents of The United States
“My Friends” Red Hot Chili Pepers
“Now & Forever”Carole King
“Stand By Me” Ben E. King
“Still A Friend Of Mine Incognito
“Teach Your Children” Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young
“That’s What Friends Are For”   Dionne Warwick & Friends
“Thank You For Being a Friend”Golden Girls Theme
“The Boys Are Back In Town” Thin Lizzy
“These Are Days”  10,000Maniacs
“This is The Time”Billy Joel
“Together Forever”Rick Astley
“Walking On Sunshine”Katrina & The Waves
“We Are The Champions” Queen
“We Are The World”
“We Go Together” from the movie Grease
“We Will Rock You” Queen
“What About Your Friends TLC
“What’s Up” (what’s going on) 4 Non Blondes
“Whenever I Call You Friend” Melissa Manchester
“With A Little Help From My Friends” Beatles or Joe Cocker
“You’re My Best Friend Queen
“You’ve Got A Friend In Me” Randy Newman from Toy Story
“You’ve Got A Friend James Taylor or Carol King
“You’re A Friend Of Mine” Clarence Clemons


“As Time Goes By” – Jimmy Durante
“Forever Young” – Rod Stewart
“Have I Told You Lately” – Rod Stewart
“I Got you Babe” – Sonny & Cher
“I’ll Be There” – Mariah Carey or Jacksons version
“I’m So Excited” – The Pointer Sisters
“The Best of Times” – La Cage Aux Folles
“Through the Years” – Kenny Rogers
“Times of Your Life” – Paul Anka
“Tradition” – Fiddler on the Roof
“You Are The Sunshine of My Life” – Stevie Wonder
“You Are” – Richie Lionel
“You Light Up My Life”- Debby Boone
“You”ve Made Me So Very Happy” – Blood, Sweat & Tears
“ I get a kick out of you” Frank Sinatra
“Can’t Smile Without You” Barry Manilow
“I’ll Always Love You” Whitney Houston
“In The Mood” Glenn Miller
“La Chaim” From Fiddler on the Roof
“Sunrise Sunset” From Fiddler on the Roof
“What a Wonderful World” Louis Armstrong
“You Light Up My Life” Debbie Boone


“As Long As We Got Each Other” (Growing Pains Theme)
“Always” Mariah Carey
“Because You Loved Me”Celine Dion (Slow or Fast Mix)
“Can You Feel It” The Jacksons
“Can You Feel The Love Tonight”Elton John (Lion King)
“Can’t Stop Lovin’ You” Van Halen
“Celebration”Kool & The Gang
“Everlasting Love” Gloria Estefan
“Greatest Love Of All” Whitney Houston
“Happy Together” Turtles
“Have I Told You Lately I Love You” Rod Stewart
“Heaven Must Have Sent You” Bonnie Pointer
“Hero” Mariah Carey
“I Love You Always Forever” Donna Lewis
“I Love You” Donna Summers
“I Will Always Love You”  Whitney Houston
“I’ll Be There” Mariah Carey
“I’ll Stand By You” The Pretenders
“I’m So Excited” Pointer Sisters
“Love is a Wonderful Thing” Michael Bolton
“Not While I’m Around” (nothing’s gonna harm you…) Barbara Streisand
“Not While I’m Around” (nothing’s gonna harm you…) Barbara Streisand
“Our House” Crosby Stills & Nash
“Save The Best For Last” Vanessa Williams
“Silly Love Songs” Wings
“Teach Your Children” Crosby, Stills & Nash
“Through The Years” Kenny Rogers
“Time To Remeber” Billy Joel
“Together Forever” Rick Astley
“We’re Havin’ A Party” Rod Stewart or South Side Johnny
“Wind Beneath My Wings” Bette Midler
“You Make My Dreams Come True” Hall & Oates
“Your Mama Don’t Dance” Kenny Loggins
“Your The Inspiration” Chicago
“We Are Family” Sister Sledge

Other Miscellaneous 

“Bad to the Bone” – George Thorogood
“Celebration” – Kool and the Gang
“Daddy’s Little Girl” – Al Martino or Mills Brothers
“Dancin’ Queen” – Abba
“Eye of the Tiger” – Survivor
“Fame” – Irene Cara
“Finally”-CeCe Penniston
“Get the Party Started” – Pink
“Gettin’ Jiggy with It” – Will Smith
“Girls Just Want to Have Fun” – Cyndi Lauper
“Glamorous” – Fergie
“Happy Birthday”-Stevie Wonder
“I Feel Good”-James Brown
“I Gotta Feeling” – Black Eyed Peas
“I’m Too Sexy” – Right Said Fred
“I‘m Every Woman” – Whitney Houston
“I’m So Excited” – Pointer Sisters
“Independent Woman” – Destiny’s Child
“Isn’t She Lovely” – Stevie Wonder
“Let’s Get it Started” – Black Eyed Peas
“Little Miss Can’t be Wrong” – Spin Doctors
“Livin’ La Vida Loca” – Ricky Martin
“Livin’ on a Prayer” – Bon Jovi
“Luck be a Lady” – Frank Sinatra
“Most Beautiful Girl in the World” – Prince
“Nobody But Me” – Human Beinz
“Party Like a Rockstar” – Shop Boyz
“Pretty Fly for a White Guy” – Offspring
“Rock and Roll Part 2″ – Gary Glitter
“Rock and Roll all Night” – Kiss
“Save the Best for Last” – Vanessa Williams
“Simply the Best” – Tina Turner
“The Best (you’re simply the best..)-Tina turner
“Uptown Girl” – Billy Joel
“Wild Thing” – The Troggs

Aunts, Uncles & Cousins

“Bad Case of loving You”-Robert Palmer (also good for doctor friends)
“Bang The Drum All Day”-Todd Rundgren
“Boogie Down”-Al Jarreau
“Celebration”-Kool & The Gang
“Do You Believe In Magic”-Loving Spoonful
“Ease On Down The Road”-Michael Jackson & Diana Ross
“Good Times” (these are the good times)-Chic
“Groove Me”-King Floyd
“Happy Together”-The Turtles
“Hot Hot Hot”-Buster Poindexter
“Hot Stuff”-Donna Summers
“How Sweet It Is” (to be loved by you)-Marvin Gaye or James Taylor
“I Just Called To Say I Love You”-Stevie Wonder
“I Love The Nightlife”-Alicia Bridges
“I Say A Little Prayer”-Dionne Warwick
“I Think I Love You”-The Partridge Family
“I Wanna Have Some Fun”-Samantha Fox
“If My Friends Could See Me Now”-Linda Clifford
“It’s A Family Affair”-Sly & The Family Stone
“It’s Not Unusual”-Tom Jones
“Land of 1000 Dances” – Wilson Pickett
“Let Your Love Flow-“Bellamy Brothers
“Get On Your Feet” Gloria Estefan
“Hot Hot Hot” Buster Pointdexter
“I Just Called To Say I Love You” Stevie Wonder
“Land of a 1,000 Dances” Wilson Pickett
“Love will keep us Together” Captain & Tennile
“There’s a Party Going On” Yvonne
“Walking On Sunshine” Katrina & The Waves
“We Are Family” Sister Sledge
“Where’s The Party” Madonna
“Your Love is Lifting Me Higher” Jackie Wilson

Brothers, Sisters, Any Male or Female

“1,2,3,4,”(Sumpin New)  Coolio
“Baby Love” The Supremes (especially if very young)
“Bad to the Bone” Tag Team
“Born to Be Wild” Steppenwolf
“Dancing Queen” Abba
“Dating Game Theme” Herb Albert
“Do Wah Diddy” (there she was..)Manford Mann
“Foxy Lady” Jimi Hendrix
“Godfather Theme, “Speak Softly Love” (also use for Italian friends
“I Saw Her Standing There” Beatles
“I’m Every Woman” Whitney Houston or Chaka Kahn
“I’m Gonna Be (I would walk 500 miles)” Proclaimer
“I’m Too Sexy” Right Said Fred
“Isn’t She Lovely” Stevie Wonder
“Just A Girl” No Doubt
“Just Can’t Wait To Be King” The Lion King
“Lady” Commodores
“Lean On Me” Bill Withers, Club Nouveau
“Let’s Hear It For The Boy” Denise Williams
“Macho Man” Village Man
“Material Girl” Madonna
“Miss America”
“More Than A Woman Bee Gees
“Most Beautiful Girl in The World” Prince
“My Girl” Temptations
“Pretty Woman” Roy Orbinson or Van Halen
“Rocky Theme” (Gonna Fly Now)  Bill Conti
“Soul Man” Sam & Dave or Blues Brothers
“Superman” Theme
“Supermodel” Jill Sobule (from movie Clueless)
“The Sister Song” Barney
“U Got the Look” Prince
“Uptown Girl” Billy Joel
“Whatta Man” Salt & Pepa
“Whenever I Call You Friend” Melissa Manchester
“Whoomp, There it Is” Tag Team
“Wild Thing” The Throggs
“Wind Beneath My Wings” Bette Midler
“Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” Cyndi Lauper
“Hakutta Matata” Lion King
“I’ll Stand By You” The Pretenders
“Isn’t She Lovely” Stevie Wonder
“Macho Man” Village People
“My Girl”Temtations
“Pretty Woman” Roy Orbison
“Soul Man” Blues Brothers
“Supermodel” Rupaul
“Wild Thing” The Throggs
“You Are The Sunshine of My Life” Stevie Wonder

*** Remember That The Candle Lighting categories are just recommendations please be creative and don’t hesitate to mix and match don’t forget if its not on the list you may have to supply it **

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